This year I’m dedicating Mother’s Day to Grandma D. Grandma passed away at the ripe age of 96 on February 12, 2016. My dad and his sisters laid her to rest on Friday beside my Grandpa.

Her memory brings a smile to my face daily. It’s a new and emotional experience to pass-up the perfect Mother’s Day card in the realization that she is no longer there. But, I have faith heaven has WiFi and this message will get to her!

Here are the words I shared at her memorial on February 13, 2016. Happy Mother’s Day Grandma!

When I was 10 years old, we got new neighbours. But it wasn’t a potential new friend or a neighbourhood pet, it was Grandma and Grandpa. This was great! I saw our territory as expanding, doubling in fact. The alleyway between our houses officially belonged to the Ducheminski’s. As kids, we now had a shortcut to the park, we had a spare key in times of routine lockouts and when I got my first car, I had my own covered parking stall. Most importantly though, our silos became a village. And as the saying goes: “it takes a village to raise a child.” Grandma’s subtle influences like daily routines and strong work ethic continue to guide me through the thick and thin and provide comforts for my young family today.
As my neighbour and fellow villager, my grandma and I had the unique opportunity to develop our own special bond: turns out, a friendship. When I would drop-in, a plate of cream filled cookies would quickly spill out in front of me. As I reflect back on those visits, it occurs to me that Grandma didn’t say a whole lot. She most certainly was a good listener.
Whether it be by nature or through nurture, my grandma taught us to be radiant. She went to bed in curlers, which to me, is so refined. And her outfits were classic. Looking good and feeling confident are one in the same, but that wasn’t her lesson on beauty. Rather, what I loved most about Grandma is when I spoke, or when anyone spoke, Grandma smiled.
My mom recently told me that when she and my dad were gathering her items, they noticed that although her slippers were bright and fluffy on top, they were tattered and torn on the bottom. Grandma was on the go. We have all searched the Maddison high and low for our busy, happy, loving Irene. If there was a young, strapping musician on location, you can be sure Grandma was front row and centre. She flirted endlessly with my man, I’m sure she did the same with you and yours too! She laughed at my jokes and she was full of zingers herself. She held my hand so tight when we visited, I could feel her pulse in my heart. Again, Grandma was radiant.
My last visit with Grandma was in November. At 8 months pregnant, I took my eldest son Julian, to the Maddison. We found Grandma in Eleanor’s room and wheeled her back for a visit. I told her I was expecting my third baby. I asked her: “If it’s a girl this time what should I name her?” Despite her fatigue, despite her dementia, Grandma raised her head and raised her voice: “Catherine.”

Thank you everyone for joining us in celebrating Grandma. Although we are stricken by grief at this time, we are also blessed with her radiant spirit. With each handshake you exchange, grandma is there. Her grasp so tender and so tight. Always hard to let go.